Confession: Sometimes I watch my SAHM friends and feel a twinge of remorse and guilt. These moms are saints in my mind and get to spend so much time with their kids, never feeling guilt for dropping them off at daycare or with a sitter. Never feeling guilty for being away from them for 10-11 hours out of the day. These mamas get to enjoy date nights without the guilt of being away from their kids all day and then all night. You see, most of the time I’ll opt to stay home during the week because being a working mom means I’m overburden with mom guilt if I leave them for another second for a social event. If this sounds like you, then mama I’m here to say STOP! We need to stop giving 110% of ourselves to others. It’s OK to be selfish sometimes and take 20% percent for you.
Best Advice for Working Moms Suffering from Mom Guilt
You’re doing it for your child.
Going to work and leaving your child with caretaker? You’re doing it for them! Believe in yourself and know that you’re working for a purpose. You’re working to provide your children with a better life and teaching them about work ethic. Or maybe it’s not about the money. Maybe you’re doing it because you KNOW you’re not cut out to be a SAHM. That’s OK! Your child is growing and thriving being around other people who nurture them and teach them.
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They won’t remember one missed event.
Your child is having a party at school and parents are invited. Being a working parent means that sometimes you won’t be able to make it to every event. That’s nothing to feel guilty about. It’s life. If you’re lucky enough, someone else can fill in for you and you might actually make their day! Sending a grandparent or babysitter in your place could mean the world to them. Don’t feel like you need to volunteer for every party or witness every talent show.
You deserve alone time.
This one is hard for most of us. Becoming a parent usually means sacrificing a bit of ourselves. Some mornings (usually Monday’s) I practically skip out the door to go to work. I cherish the quiet commute to work and embrace it as my alone time. Whether you hide in a closet for 5-10 minutes of solitude or schedule a babysitter so you can run errands solo, just know, you deserve it for sacrificing so much of your body and soul.
Guilt is no stranger to any mom. Some moms may seem more put together and patient than others, but just know that we all experience the same feelings at some point. We all deserve to know we’re doing our best and guilt should have no place in our hearts. You are amazing, mama.